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Fap equals fail : Chinese army clamps down on masturbation

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Lately, Chinese Army has been in news for all the wrong reasons. The continued standoff at Doklam or the rash rendevouz at Pangong Lake, the protectors of the Chinese land are at the receiving end of incessant jingoist bombshells hurled by some ultra-nationalist voices in the country. With all the serious hawkish TV news debates, here is a bit of spice to add on to the China army epic. The world’s most populous country is worried about the large number of would-be recruits failing its stringent entrance tests. To counter the burgeoning failures – it has one advice to youngsters appearing for induction into the forces – stop masturbating and playing video games.

As weird as it may sound, this diktat is issued from the top planks of the world’s largest military to ensure the new incumbents are in perfect health to join their ranks. People’s Liberation Army in its official social media handle spelt out 10 reasons behind the large number of failures encountered by youth who appear for Army fitness tests. According to the post, 20 percent of the applicants were overweight while 8 percent refused because of an enlarged testicular vein.

The enlarged testicular vein, according to high ranking officials were caused by too much video games, masturbation and too little physical activity. Tattoos on the body, liver problems associated with alcohol also contributed to failure for the would-be recruits.

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